You know how when people say when you’re feeling good the sun shines a little brighter, the birds sing a little sweeter?
Well when you’re a grade ‘A’, 5th dan, Jedi miserable bastard like myself these “pleasures” will be forever illusive. It’s a matter of time before that sun blinds me while cycling and sends me off to meet the front end of the number 36 to Kilbarchan. And the birds, well I’ve never seen the point. When you get beyond the squawking, shitting and swooping their just all smug about being able to fly. Am I right? (note to self it’s pointless to pose a question if no one reads it)
Truth be known I wouldn’t have it any other way. If I didn’t have this chip on my shoulder...well I’d probably mess up my balance for a start. Ha that’s a fantastic miserablest joke.
No really it’s best to bleak, none more black etc. It doesn’t mean you don’t enjoy yourself. Far from it. You get all the real enjoyment normal people get (apart from the sun and the birds and all that sugary nonsense), but you also get a whole lot more. It’s like you discover a secret hidden level of enjoyment. In this secret land, within darker regions of the brain you get to swear, sneer, be smug, and feel you’re better than others completely without foundations. If you’re lucky you’ll also discover the bonus special power when in there, otherwise known as borderline alcoholism.
Let’s face it life’s just one big computer game. I’ve got access to a secret level and you can go whistle if you think I’m telling you lot how to get in.
PS it’s dark in here.
I never did realise you were a miserable bastard. Well, apart from the sad :( music and the Ian Curtis obsession, but apart from that I always thought you were really cheery. Apart from the not liking birds and sunshine of course. siiggh. sure you're great craic really! PMA Mr Mullen, PMA!
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